Googlesoft the Imperial Hybrid

I haven't written a derogatory, demeaning, whimsical post in a while.  And it also seems that my spelling has fallen off by the wayside.  I had to look up how to spell derogatory.  Yes, I know.

I just tweeted that Windows Mobile sucks, and that I was going to tweet this from my Windows Mobile phone, but my phone crashed on me, so I had to use tweetDeck.  This made me think that I should probably write another nonsensical post about how these Tech-Gods must fall.  But this time, I want to combine my unique abilities into one hybrid attack on both Google and Microsoft.

Well, it's not really an attack since I'm using Firefox and Firefox is really beginning to suck also.  It seems that the more we become technologically advanced, the more things suck, except for sex toys, it seems.  They're getting better!!!  Yahoo!!  Pun intended for you prudes out there.

I've been following this issue on Chrome's very own website in which users are begging Chrome to make a sidebar like Firefox and IE and Opera and Safari and Maxthon have, so we geeky types can put things like bookmarks, history, and other neat browsing stuff in there.  But Chrome's officials official response is that it's too hard for them.  Yeah right, like they couldn't make an install for Chrome so you can  choose an install path of your choice.  It seems that Google can't do a lot of stuff that other companies, or people in general, can.  Hm, is that the case or is there something else lurking beneath this great Big Search Engine in the Clouds...

We all know how Microsoft is incompetent because we all know how incompatible Microsoft is with its own software, and sometimes how its own software is incompatible with its own Operating System (Windows).  Or how one version of a Microsoft app is incompatible with the "same" app in another Operating System (Macintosh).  And they claim that they're on the cutting edge of technology.  I would say that they're just cutting themselves and bleeding from overusing those words: Cutting edge.  Cutting edge to Microsoft means releasing Operating Systems that contain 10,000 to 50,000 known bugs (or hidden viruses), which a lot of them tend to be security vulnerabilities.  If you ever check Windows update codes (that oogligook number that appears next to each update) you'll be scared when you visit Microsoft's site and actually read why that is being patched.

So, I'm getting ready for tech armageddon by using Linux.  I'm stuck on Fedora 11 right now, which end of life is approaching way too quickly for me, and I should probably upgrade to Fedora 13.   But Fedora 12 had these problems with KVM (Keyboard, Video, Monitor) switches, which basically crashed if you switched away from Fedora.  I hope this is fixed in Fedora 13.  And you may say, "You're making fun of Microsoft?"  Well, Fedora is free.  And it certainly behaves way, way, way, way, way better than Windows ever has, with the exception of XP SR2.  I have to give them that.  But, of course, they did the Microsoft thing by making Vista next and making 75% of the computing world pee in their pants.  Windows 7 doesn't suck, but it's no XP SP2.

OK, so I got a bit sidetracked on this, like always.  The point is that Microsoft always claims that they let you do computing your way with Windows.  Well, I'm still waiting for these Redmond dufuses (may not be a real word) to make good on this.  I've been waiting since 1997.  Thirteen years have gone by, and it seems that I'm losing more control of my operating system.  Stupid Windows Explorer won't show me the correct megabyte (or gigabyte) count for a specific folder.  Why?  When I "Googled" it, I saw a post from Microsoft's own site stating that (derogatory paraphrase follows): "We didn't want to confuse you idiotic users with dynamic file size counting, so we kept it simple and inaccurate so you idiotic people won't be confused."  When you set a folder to display thumbnails, and you set the sort order and sort by, it doesn't work at first.  You have to wait until Windows finishes thinking and counting before the entire folder is reordered to what you have configured it to do.  My way???  I don't think so.  This idiotic user doesn't mind being confused with dynamic file count.  I'm confused by how Microsoft does things anyway, this is a small price to pay for accuracy.  Oh, wait, I forgot, their programmers probably couldn't program that correctly without shooting Windows CPU usage to 100%, like they did with Windows Search for Vista (when turned on, this "service" would eat up 100% of your CPU and wouldn't let your processor go free in Vista).  I guess I may just have to live with inaccurate file count size.

So, Google has adopted this "we won't let you do things your way" attitude under the guise of a benevolent dictatorship.  Plato was wrong, I say, there is no such thing as a benevolent tyrant, dictator, monarch or any permutation thereof.  Control is control, and all power corrupts absolutely.  Chrome is the prime example of this theory.  Sure, it's faster than Firefox, Opera, Internet Explorer (of course), and Safari.  Well, maybe.  It handles heavy javascripted sites with ease.  But, it does produce weird results in GUI input fields that do use javascript, like FCKEditor, which Drupal is fond of using (or even CCK).  Also, it doesn't have a sidebar.  ALL, and I repeat, ALL other browsers out there have one.  Why can't they make one?  Because power made them incompetent, just like Microsoft.  And if ever they release ChromeOS, world beware, it's going to take over your computing habits, do searches based on what it thinks you're searching for, and will make you eat junk food.  I swear, I read this somewhere.  OK, maybe it won't make you eat junk food, but you'll probably have to resort to a lot of cannabis smoking to calm yourself down when you're trying to look up the history of Rush (the prog rock band) and it grabs websites relating to that windbag Rush Limbo.  Because, that's what they are planning to do.  ChromeOS my ass, and I have a big ass.

All right, rant is over, and I just put months worth of reading up just for you.  I say months because it'll take you months to decypher what the hell I'm saying here.  And you'll probably come back to read this and say: "Oh my God, he really did say that."  Please, Mozilla Foundation, please, make Firefox better, and the Fedora group, please make Fedora work with my Belkin KVM (USB) switch so I can get off Fedora 11.  And maybe I'll install Wine and do everything on Linux, and not install Chrome.  I may have to go back to SeaMonkey.  I hope not.